Breaking News! Zombies Invade TJSL!
- Zombies! RUN!
The Thomas Jefferson School of Law was invaded by zombies on Monday, October 31!
Witnesses identified the invading zombies as Dean Rudy Hasl, Professor Steve Semeraro, Professor Bill Slomanson and Assistant Dean William Byrnes.
They had white pasty skin, bugged-out eyeballs and their arms stretched out straight ahead. Said Faculty Assistant Randy Ward, “I was terrified!”
“I was scared to death,” said 1L Rory Mcnea. “I was just sitting in my Legal Writing class, completely engrossed in what Professor Elizabeth McCuskey was saying, when all of a sudden zombies Hasl, Semeraro, Slomanson and Byrnes came in and started terrorizing students in the classroom.”
The San Diego Police Department was called in only after Assistant Director of Academic Administration, Skylar Rayhill escaped the clutches of Zombie Semeraro. “I have seen this before,” Rayhill said. “Every year on October 31st Dean Hasl turns into a ferocious zombie, but this year there are more of them.”
“There were hundreds of invaders,” said Director of Academic Administration Kay Henley. “Almost all of the professors and even some members of the staff were like the walking dead.”
“I know that professors can be scary, but seeing them as zombies is going to give me nightmares for the rest of my life,” said 3L Elisabeth Donovan. “I think I even saw them drag off Chief Information Officer James Cooper.”
Police are still looking for Cooper.